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Pure Thoughts

School starts tomorrow. Ugh…

I haven’t the energy to blog, really. It seems like all I can share right now is my love life, and it could become boring as the months come., or weeks, if you get easily bored reading one topic over and over.

Sometimes it feels like the days become shorter when you are with someone, and longer, when you are waiting for that someone to be with you again. You don’t really mean to feel sad about it, but you do, just because it feels right most of the time. I don’t want to lose myself. I am not saying that I am, but I could. I don’t know how that would happen, but it could very well happen. Not anytime soon, I hope.

I am not really sure if I am making any sense, but I am just typing as I think.

Yesterday, I told Ryan that sometimes I think that he’s still a stranger in my life. I don’t even know why I told him that, but it just popped in my mind while we were eating at Burger King. The thought came to me, like, it was real. Maybe it is. Sometimes I still can’t believe I have someone in my life now.

The other night, before he left, he touched my face and said good night. I don’t know why, but, it made my eyes moist. Yep, tears welled up. It’s like, how he touches me and looks at me, shows how much he cares. I have never in my relationship-life experienced that kind of honesty in a man. Not with words, but by his actions. I don’t even tell him that. I just want him to unconsciously make my heart start and stop at the same time.

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My Weekend

The past few days flew by so fast! But it was fun. Last Saturday I was with Ryan, we had a movie marathon at his place. We watched The Gladiator, The Fast and The Furious Tokyo Drift, and The Da Vinci Code. In between the movies, we ate dinner. During the movies, we ate lots of junk food! We were so stuffed! His cousins were cool, too. Some of his friends dropped by to say “Hi!”

By Sunday, he went to our place and we went to church with my family. Then we had lunch here at home. After that, we went to the mall and bought some school stuff. I bought new Spongebob notebooks. They’re cute! After which, we went to my cousin’s kid’s 5th birthday party. Yep, it was a kid’s party. We had fun, though. By 6pm, the kids had gone home and only the adults are around. A videoke machine was set up. Ryan sang one song, “Yellow” by Coldplay. I sang two. Ryan had one beer, I had none.

We went home by 8pm. Ryan was supposed to go to work at 3:30am today, but last night he was too tired to go.

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Vodka, is teh love…

Last night was fun. :thumbsup:

My friend, JeAr, with my new friend, Grace, came here for a night of Vodka and fun. :thumbsup: Ringo was supposed to come too, but he backed out at the last minute. Well, we’ve (JeAr and I) already figured out that he won’t show up. We still enjoyed the night, though.

We got here at around 9pm. We bought pork chops at the market, I marinated and cooked them. I fried the squid rolls, too. While I was cooking, we also watched The OC. Of course, here, we’re still watching Season 3. The episode last night was when Marissa died. I cried. Damn… She’s needed in The OC, she’s one of the main characters! But according to Hollywood news, she didn’t want to be in it anymore. :stare:

Anyway, after eating dinner. We went outside our house. We stayed there for quite a while and took a LOT of pictures. Yes, a LOT. All in all, we took 160 pictures in one night!

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All those pictures will be posted on my Multiply account soon. Then, we started drinking. Opened up a bottle of Vodka and Sprite, as our chaser. All the pulutan on the table. Ready to fight!

I am no drinker. I used to drink until I can’t stand straight anymore. Mind you, I’ve never been drunk. We used a shot glass, and used the Vodka bottle cap to measure what we drink. We decided on one per shot and a gulp of Sprite. When the bottle is half full, we decided to go out of the house again, about 2 in the morning, and we were taking loads of pictures again! We took a lot of funny pictures, especially JeAr!

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Bitin?

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Up Late

[update]I just uploaded my new layout![/update]

I’ve been wanting to blog for quite some time now, but every time I start to type something, it just doesn’t feel right. Hmm…

Misery. I haven’t felt that in a long time. Do I miss it? I am not even sure. It seems like I get my inspiration through misery. Weird. Or maybe it’s not weird. I don’t know… Maybe I am just being crazy right now. Doing nothing at home is making me crazy! Argh…

I got my grades today. I’d say, I got pretty good grades. Our point system is 1.00 as the highest and 5.00 as failing, 3.00 as passing.
Basic Drawing and Drafting————-1.50 Very Good
Basic Computer Concepts————–1.50 Very Good
Color Theory————————–2.00 Satisfactory
NSTP———————————1.75 Good
Office Productivity Tools 1————-1.50 Very Good
General Weighted Average————-1.65

Ryan was here yesterday. Making up for last Friday? It was fun. We watched the DVDs he brought, National Treasure and Alien VS Predator. My sisters and brother were here, and we watched the movie with them. My mom came home in the middle of AVP. Ryan said that when he was walking away from our house tonight, his feet felt heavy, like he didn’t want to go home yet. He said, It’s like, I’m not supposed to go home yet…like I want to stay with you. I felt sad…” Aww…

The other night, I couldn’t help but pour my heart out to him. I told him how I felt about what happened last Friday. I was telling him why I was upset. He made me feel like he didn’t understand me at all, so I had to explain and elaborate the bits and pieces of my feelings.

We’re OK now. Back to normal, if I might say. He’s out right now, playing DOTA with his friends again. I’m cool with that, at least we were together yesterday.

Tonight, my friends JeAr, Ringo and their friend Grace is coming over my place. We’re going to have our little Halloween party. It should be fun! I already bought the junk foods we’re going to eat while drinking. *yum* I am not going to drink, I think… I don’t like drinking booze anymore. I used to drink more than 5 bottles of San Mig Light, but now, 2 bottles can put me to sleep. :yawn:

And don’t forget to join my ever growing, ever active message board!
The Wickeds MB The Wickeds MB The Wickeds MB

Plus, Naples rhinoplasty!

I Am Sad…

It’s been four years since I had a real relationship with someone, and now that I do… I think I am back to square one. In some ways, I feel the need to be with him 24/7. But of course, that is impossible. I know that we both have different priorities and we live 2 hours apart. It’s hard to just meet up when we feel the urge to. Like today… well, it’s been the arrangement that we meet twice a week, on his off days from work. But… he chose to rest at home. And NO, he did not stay at home. He went out with his friends, went to the mall, hang out… now it’s past 1AM and he’s still out playing DOTA. And he tells me he’s resting?

I feel defeated. :cry:

Yeah, yeah…

I understand that I have to let him go out with his friends also. But his friends are his neighbors whom he can see everyday! So, for this whole day, I just didn’t text message him much, but he calls. So we talk, but I don’t feel like talking because he just makes me miss him more…

Super Short Hiatus

It’s my finals from tomorrow until Friday, so I won’t be here to read your blogs or comment on them either. Duh. :lol:

I will be back come Monday, when all the chaos is done. In addition to my finals, I have to write an article for the school newspaper about a choral recitation I didn’t see. :S

In addition to my normal chaos, our phone is not working again. So, to me, who uses dial-up internet connection, that’s a whole lotta hell! I am currently at Netopia, an internet cafe. I had to download stuff needed for our NSTP project. My classmates emailed them to me last night.

I’ve so much things to do! Good luck to me!

Have a great rest of the week!

P.S.
Despair.nu members, I might not be able to comment on your blogs for maybe, 3-4 days, due to lack of internet access at home, and I have to study for finals. So, please bear with me.

I Realized I’m Not Alone

Just thinking about school is giving me a headache! Okay, well, maybe I am slightly exaggerating, but, really, it’s so stressful just thinking about the things that I have to do. Next week is hell week. Final exams are scheduled on the 19th to the 21st. Besides cramming for all my subjects, I have to squeeze in this project for our NSTP subject. We have to go our local baranggay, talk to the baranggay captain and send out surveys to the community. Of course, we have to make a written report for that, which, in this case, I know for sure that I will be the one to do alone, unless, someone offers help. Sigh… I am so stressed out! Time is running out and I want to pull my hair out! Argh!

Anyway, yesterday, Ryan and I went out to watch The Guardian. It stars Kevin Costner and Ashton Kutcher. The movie, for me, was kind of slow. I mean, the turn of events were, in a way, a bit boring. It’s an emotional film. But overall, it’s not a waste of money and time. I believe, the main purpose of the movie is to touch hearts, and it did touch mine. So that’s what we did last night after having dinner at Chef ‘d Angelo.

Today, he picked me up from school and we enjoyed a movie marathon. We started with Once Upon a Time in Mexico (Banderas, Depp, Hayek). Then we ate lunch with my sisters, Juvy and Chicka. After lunch, we continued the marathon with Animatrix, which made me understand The Matrix trilogy more; we ended the marathon with The Matrix. I love the trilogy, so watching it again is cool with me.

Dinner was prepared by my mom. She cooked vegetables. It was good. After dinner, Ryan and my mom were still sitting in the dining area, so my mom started chatting away with Ryan. I even felt that he was trapped because when my mom starts to talk, there’s no stopping her. Hahaha! After an hour of chat with my mom, we hooked up his iPod to my computer and added some new songs. I asked him if he felt trapped with my mom, he said he actually enjoyed talking to her. Well, I notice how he really responds to my mom and he really does seem interested. He’s such a doll!

When I tell him that I am so stressed out from all the things I had to do for school, he just never stops telling me that I can do it, and he believes in my abilities. It’s been a long time since someone really put their money on me, metaphorically speaking. I used to just stand alone, absorbing all the worries and pressure by myself. I didn’t have a sponge that’d do it for me. Now, I do have someone. I guess, I never really realized it until now. I am glad he came.

Perfect Day

Today is one of those perfect days. Yes, I am in love. Mushy 24/7 :kiss: Eek! 8O

I woke up at 10am, excited, finally it’s Sunday. I’d get to meet with Ryan. Sunday is Ryan day. Well, not anymore Sunday, because his off days are moved to Thursday-Friday. Anyway, I was getting ready to go to our meeting place when he called, saying “We can’t meet. My aunt didn’t leave my money. Can we just hang out here at home?” But of course, I didn’t want to ruin the plan. I called him up again and told him that our plan would still push through, that he just had to show up and not worry about anything.

An hour later, we’re at Robinson’s Galleria. I text messaged my friend from Movie World and told him we’re there. He met us near Burger King. Since he works there, he gave us two movie passes. So that solves the money ish for our movie money. Yay! Connections, connections! We went to Cinema 5 and had the security guard stamp us on our arms. We had to eat lunch first.

Our best choice was Teriyaki Boy. We were so stuffed after eating so we just walked inside the mall and did window shopping. After walking for an hour, we decided to go to an internet cafe and check our emails, since the movie wouldn’t start for another hour and 40mins. My friend, Dyan, met with us there.

At 3pm, we headed to Tom’s World and let Ryan play some arcade games while Dyan and I just talked and talked, catching up. By 3:30pm, we headed to the cinema, found good seats smacked down the middle for good viewing. We watched The Departed, starring Jack Nicholson, Mark Walhberg, Leonardo DiCaprio, Matt Damon, Alec Baldwin and Martin Sheen. Can I just say that the movie rocks? Man, I loved it! It is actually the remake of the Chinese film “Internal Affairs”. Hollywood bought the copyright of the film, just like they did “The Ring”. The star studded cast was a definite bonus. I love Mark Walhberg in films, and Leo was exceptional here. Jack Nicholson, as always, great job! If you haven’t seen it, go watch it! Worth every penny!

After the movie, we met up with Glenn, Ryan’s friend, who we introduced to my friend, Dyan a few weeks back. We heard mass at the EDSA Shrine. After the mass, we ate at Burger King because we’re all hungry! Then we headed to Gloria Jean’s. Dyan and I bought Mint Chocolate Bomb, our mutual favorites. Yum! :yum: While the boys went to a cellphone shop to charge Glenn’s phone, Dyan and I talked some more. You see, Glenn actually likes her. Of course, Dyan doesn’t want to rush into another relationship since her last one did something bad to her. So it’s kind of hard for her to just love again. Well, I just hope she’ll be happy with someone who loves her so deeply soon.

The night ended at 10:10pm. Ryan accompanied me home. Sad, I am. I am looking forward to see him on Thursday. He said he’s got a surprise for me. I wonder what it is… Hmm… He didn’t give me a clue! Pfft.. I guess, I’ll just have to wait!

Busy – Busyhan…

I’ve been wanting to blog for the past few days, but when I start to type, I just don’t know what to say. Nothing so big has happened to me lately, except that I am busy with school work. We have a group report due on Monday, I am the leader. Then there is another plate for my drawing class, a drawing of anything in sandpaper using oil pastel. Sounds cool, huh? Well, it would be, if I can think of a subject to draw.

Monday, October 2, there was a flash flood here. Ryan was here that day. It just rained so hard that night, around 8pm. We didn’t think of it as anything destructive. Apparently, while we were watching Harry Potter 4, lots of people, things, houses were being washed away by the flood. Ryan left at 10pm. I was a bit puzzled why there was a flood on the highway. It took him an hour to get past the flood, and another 2 hours to get home. The next day, I learned that there was a flash flood the night before. That explained all the mud I saw on the highway and the cracked part of the streets. That night, I watched the news and saw the damages that were done all throughout the province. There was even a grandmother that was washed away by the flood and her body was never recovered… It made me think of how lucky my family are, that we didn’t have to go through what they did. I just hope this kind of tragedy won’t happen again.

This school semester is nearing its end. I just received my midterm grade today. It’s ok. My two subjects are under 90%, but my general average is still above 90% so I am good. According to my classmate, if we get a real high grade, we could get 25% off our tuition, which would really help. I wish I’d get that to help my dad. My sister, who studies nursing, has a really expensive tuition, and my brother, who’s in high school is the same. A little financial help would do a lot of good for my dad. So I hope I get that 25% off.

One last thing, VIRUS SUCKS! I just reformatted my computer and because I have Norton AV, it detected a Dialer.Trojan. Pfft… Virus makers, DIE!

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I Survived A Storm

I thought I was dreaming inside a dream. I awoke with the sounds of the window blinds rhythmically tapping the edge of my bed. Winds enter the room from the window with great strength and power. The paper from the study table is now found on the floor. I noticed that the electric fan is no longer working, but I still feel so cold. I snuggled against my pillows and pulled my comforter up to my neck. I heard my mom telling my brother to go upstairs to get something. I got the information from him that a typhoon called Millenio hit the country. The electricity is out and our phone is not working. Great, I groaned to myself. I didn’t make a move to get off bed. I just lay there for the longest time.

I tried lots of times to contact Ryan. The people in their house are weird. Well, one of them is. I called and asked for him and she said, “Isn’t it raining there?” I said yes. Then she replied with, “The winds are so strong here, just call later.” I was like, “WTF?” I don’t see the connection. If the winds were so strong, it doesn’t mean Ryan can’t talk to me, right? Oh well. An hour later, Ryan text messaged me and told me that their phone is not working anymore and there is no electricity in their place. The duhat tree from their neighbor fell onto a power line.

I accompanied my dad to circle our subdivision. A lot of the trees have been removed from its roots by the typhoon’s strong winds. A lot of debris can be found on the streets. We were lucky that the tree from the back of our house didn’t give us any trouble. We have a huge mango tree from the backyard, and a huge Camachile tree further back. It’s a good thing that my dad had them (maintenance crew) trim the Camachile tree before the typhoon arrived in the Philippines. I saw the biggest branch cut off from it when we passed by the street at the back of our house.

It’s unfortunate for some people who lost their houses from the floods. We have a battery operated radio so we were able to get updates. I heard that a tree fell on an old woman, it’s a good thing that there were people who helped her right away. Some people were stuck in their roofs in Cavite. A mother called the radio station to inform the authorities that her 4-year-old kid and nieces with their help is stuck in their roof and was not responding to calls anymore. She was crying desperately for help. I didn’t get an update on that anymore. I just hope they’re all safe.

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