ONE. I woke up at 11am. My sibs, Chicka and ZJ, and I planned to watch XMEN-3. I started to prepare to go to the mall, when my dad announced he’s going to my grandma’s in Makati with my mom. He asked me where I was going and I told him that I am going to watch a XMEN-3 with my sibs. Then he said to just come with them to Market Market. We arrived at Market Market by 1:30pm. We had lunch first at Aling Nena’s. We had kare-kare, lechon baboy, ginataang tilapya and soup with gulaman. See? Zero soda. It was a big lunch. Goodbye diet, HELLO more pounds! Well, I am not really in a diet, I am just trying to eat right.

TWO. JeAr said that his friend, Lot, wants to get to know me. I was a bit hesitant because she was a close friend to JeAr’s ex-girlfriend who hates me coz she thought JeAr and I are something else besides being friends. Anyway, I accepted the offer. Apparently, Lot wants to learn how to design websites and she says my website rocks! Yeah!

THREE. My good friend, Marvin from Arizona, and I had a chat in YM. We’ve been friends for a long time, and for some of you who have been reading my blog eversince, you’d know who he is. Anyway, he said that he is going to be working at a TV station there, channel 3 AZ, for a dance contest that will run for 6 weeks. He says, he’ll be one of the judges and will be a dance director. Coolness! If any of you have seen “So You Think You Can Dance” in Fox last year, he was one of the top 50 finalists, the only Pinoy. Sayang lang, hindi siya nanalo. But he is a damn good dancer. He also mentioned that he will come here next June. Lagi nyang sinasabi na magpapa-inom daw AKO, pagdating nya, at GIN daw! Hahaha! At long last, matutuloy din ang inuman!

FOUR. This morning, my mom got so mad at us because no one washed the dishes last night. It was my sister’s turn, but she didn’t do it. The consequence for that is no one is allowed to use the computer. But since that is not possible for me, I text messaged my mom and told her that it is unfair. She said that I am the eldest and that I should manage the house. Exactly, manage. It doesn’t mean I should wash the dishes when it is not my turn. Besides, they are grown ups, they shouldn’t be told when to do their chores. So, I just washed my clothes, cleaned the bedroom and cleaned my electric fan, and after that, I sat in front of the computer and do my thing. Ha!

FIVE. My life is a little boring right now. I want to work on a new layout for my main site, but my ideas are whack. I drew a lot of layouts on my notebook, but none of it seems okay. Maybe, I just lack inspiration. I don’t know.

SIX. I dreamed about my first love. Hahaha! It’s so weird, coz in my dream, he is still that little boy that I fell in love with. He is much taller now, he still looks gorgeous and his brown eyes still do the job. In my dream, we were in our old school and we were always holding hands. Then we had to go to this place that I am not familiar with, when we got there, a lot of people were there, and in my head, they were doing something bad to us. But since I am with him, he did his best to protect me by never leaving my side. But still, it was weird because he was a little boy and I am twenty-three! It was a good dream, though.

SEVEN. My dad asked me to apply to go to Australia. I think it is a good idea, and I am currently reading everything about it carefully. I guess, at this point in my life, I have to learn to stand up for myself and be very independent. I can’t live at my parent’s house forever. I want a life of my own, a home, and maybe someday, a family. My mind is just so confused right now with everything going on. But for now, I’d just focus on school.

Yep, me not dead. Me, still alive! But me feels like this — :chain:

My dad is at his work, 4 hours away from our house, and he promised to bring the computer to a shop to get it fixed as soon as he gets home, which is 3 days from now. Another long wait! But I promise, I will be patient.

Anyway, so today, I am in an internet shop. I am a member of Netopia, so cool, lower internet rate. It’s P50/hr for non-members and P30/hr for members. I can’t complain though, I am in dire need of computer access!

In connection to still being alive, I found out that I won the Amazing Bebot award. Wow! Thanks Sara :thumbsup:

Next “anyway”, so I don’t think he will be coming here very soon. He said he was sick, I don’t know what epidemic he’s caught… LOL! He also said that his money was put on hold at the bank, so I don’t know what’s going on. I don’t think about it too much, or about him, too much coz I don’t want to become crazy. I am crazy as it is, so crazier won’t do me good.

For the past week, I feel somewhat ugly. After staring at myself for too long in the mirror, I realized that my face is now a shape of a watermelon (exaggerating!), my tummy looks like I’m 4 months pregnant, and my arms yells “Brooke Shields!” Yep, me is getting fatter. I’ve never had problems with my self image, but sometimes, it gets to me. No, I don’t want to be thinner because others will compliment me for it, but I want to be thin because I want to be healthy. Maybe I am eating more at this time because it will be that time of month for me. Hormones are acting up again. I need to start excercising again. My metabolism is super slow, you see, so it needs a boost from time to time, specially now.

In two consecutive days, I have been having dreams that are of the same theme. In my dreams, I always have someone with me. A man, who is supposed to be my someone, if you know what I mean. On the first dream, a guy committed a crime and we ran away together so that he won’t get caught. I don’t remember what he did, but he put a swiss knife and some coins on my left pocket. Then, we headed out to the sea, and we were both swimming until we reached an island then we climbed the rocky sides of the mountain. The second dream was a bit similar. This time, I was in the pool and the guy is sitting on one of the sunbathing chairs when someone grabbed him. It seemed to me that the man who grabbed him was asking him to leave me. When he didn’t allow that to happen, the guy tried to drown me three times in the pool. The weird thing was, every time that I was submerged under water, a palm was covering my nose and mouth, allowing me to breathe. After being drowned three times, I realized I have lost my memory. I found myself crying, but the guy was still there, he was comforting me. Then I told him, that every time I remember him, I write it on paper. Weird.

Basically, in both dreams, I am swimming, or in water. According to HyperDictionary.com, swimming means:

Dreaming that you are swimming, suggests that you are exploring aspects of your unconscious mind and emotions. The dream may be a sign that you are seeking some sort of emotional support. It is a common dream image for people going through therapy. Dreaming that you are swimming underwater, suggests that you are completely submerged in your own feelings. You are forcing yourself to deal with your emotional difficulties.

while sea means:

Seeing the sea in your dream, represents your unconscious and your transition between your unconscious and conscious. It also often represents your emotions. The dream may also be a pun on your understanding and perception of a situation. “I see” or perhaps there is something you need to “see” more clearly. Alternatively, the dream may indicate a need to reassure yourself or offer reassurance to someone.

They both suggest that my dreams are related to my emotions. It’s ironic that I find it true. I feel like I am in the middle of an emotional turmoil. My thoughts of ever getting to school, or if he will find his way here, or if I will ever be successful in fulfilling my goals. I am emotionally stressed. Sigh…

I was supposed to install my new theme, but unfortunately, my computer is still not working, so just make do with my layout for now. You’re not here for the layout, right?

‘Til my next entry… I wonder when… :cry: :cry: :cry:

Toodles! :fairy: